WWJD with Gay Neighbors?
What would Jesus do if He lived next door to a gay couple? What if He met them one day as they were coming out of their apartment? Would He make small talk? Would He act like everything were cool? Would He try to get them to like Him and be His buddies?
We have no record of this exact kind of event, but Jesus did interact with sinners.
Many seem to think Jesus perpetually set Himself against the “religious” but was a buddy and friend to the regular sinners and unchurched, that He would rather hang out with prostitutes than with preachers.
According to the Bible, Jesus loved to be with anyone who wanted to be near Him. Anyone who knew they needed Him attracted His attention. But He had stern words for sinners who abused their authority or who twisted God’s law. Many who perpetrated injustice in His day were religious elites who hardened their faces against Him and His teachings, so He did pitch battle with many Pharisees and Sadducees, the religious rulers of the time. But did He indiscriminately accept sinners? How did He interact with them?
Jesus Interacted with Sinners
Let’s consider a few examples of Jesus’ interactions and teachings.
10 And as Jesus reclined at table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and sinners came and were reclining with Jesus and his disciples. 11 And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 12 But when he heard it, he said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”
Matthew 9.10–13
It looks like Jesus would have eaten with a gay couple, but He would have considered them “sick” and in need of a (spiritual) physician. He came to “call sinners,” which means call them into His kingdom, to repent of their sins and follow Him.
5 These twelve Jesus sent out, instructing them, “Go nowhere among the Gentiles and enter no town of the Samaritans, 6 but go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel. 7 And proclaim as you go, saying, ‘The kingdom of heaven is at hand.’ 8 Heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse lepers, cast out demons. You received without paying; give without pay. 9 Acquire no gold or silver or copper for your belts, 10 no bag for your journey, or two tunics or sandals or a staff, for the laborer deserves his food. 11 And whatever town or village you enter, find out who is worthy in it and stay there until you depart. 12 As you enter the house, greet it. 13 And if the house is worthy, let your peace come upon it, but if it is not worthy, let your peace return to you. 14 And if anyone will not receive you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet when you leave that house or town. 15 Truly, I say to you, it will be more bearable on the day of judgment for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah than for that town.
Matthew 10.5–15
As long as people were open to Him, He would stay and engage in fellowship. However, if they rejected Him, He would walk away (Mark 5.17, 20).
37 Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38 And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Matthew 10.37–39
Jesus would challenge a gay neighbor to love Him more than anyone or anything else in his life. He would demand the man take up his own cross and follow Him, giving up his own disordered desires and aligning his life with Jesus’ will.
24 Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. 25 For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. 26 For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? 27 For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done.
Matthew 16.24–27
Jesus would have told them they should deny themselves, lose their lives, for His sake. He would have warned them of the judgment to come! Jesus spoke often of judgment day.
Jesus would have told them to build their houses on the rock of His word (Matt. 7.24–27). He would tell them to do the will of His Father in heaven (Matt. 7.21). He would tell them about how to live righteously in His kingdom. He would tell them that “from the beginning” God created marriage to be thus: “a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and he two shall become one flesh” (Matt. 19.4).
In short, Jesus would tell a gay couple of today that they should repent of their sins and come follow Him. He would extend His offer of eternal mercy and grace to them through the blood of the cross and by the power of His resurrection. He would warn them of the judgment to come and invite them to the safety of His atonement. He would not allow them to remain in their sin, but He would completely forgive them and welcome them into His family if they repented.
I mean—that’s what Jesus has done for me.
Jesus Was a Friend…Not a Buddy
Jesus was a friend of sinners. He received them, taught them the truth, and offered them salvation. He was not buddies with sinners. John 2.24–25 says, “Jesus on His part did not entrust Himself to them, because He knew all people and needed no one to bear witness about man, for He Himself knew what was in man.” In other words, Jesus loves people but does not trust our hearts because we are fickle, precocious, and inconsistent. Jesus’ closest friends deserted Him in His darkest hour, after all.
Remember when Jesus fed 5,000 in a supernatural multiplication of bread and fish? The next day, the crowd searched for Him because they wanted more food (John 6.26). Jesus said, “Do not work for the food that perishes, but for the food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give to you” (John 6.27). He refused to feed them again, even though that’s what they were asking for. He said, “I am the bread of life” (John 6.35) and “this is the will of My Father, that everyone who looks on the Son and believes in Him should have eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day” (John 6.40). He taught them about the greatest food they could hope to have, the living bread, the very Word of God become flesh—Jesus Christ Himself. They just needed to believe in Him (John 6.29, 40, 47).
Jesus was not a walking soup kitchen. He fed the masses after He had taught them all day and they were hungry, and the miracle reminded them of the mana with which God fed Israel in the wilderness. Jesus had better bread than the bread of angels. But Jesus did not feed the masses just because they demanded it, for that was not His purpose. He taught them there was something more important even than physical food—believing in the Son of God.
What does it mean to believe in the Son of God? “Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life; whoever does not obey the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him” (John 3.35). Living faith always leads to obedience. Belief in the Son of God always leads to submission to the Son, which is what is most important to every man and woman on earth. Submit to Jesus Christ, be saved from your sins, and obtain eternal life!
As the ultimate Friend, Jesus tells people exactly what we should hear—not what we want to hear. He guides us into the truth, even when it is painful. He told a rich young ruler a message that drove the man away, and Jesus didn’t run after him to apologize or soften the message (Matt. 19.16–22).
Lord, give me wisdom to understand how I should deal with my neighbors in grace and humility while at the same time speaking the gospel clearly, calling sinners to repentance through Your word, and urging them to follow You. What a balance you showed when You walked here in our shoes! I want to be like You, Lord—a true friend to sinners.