Are Men and Women Equal?

If you are blind and deaf, you may not have heard of gender equality. Feminism has pounded, pushed, and peppered several generations now with its gospel of women’s equality, claiming the patriarchy has kept women from their true potential while men hog all the authority, all the fun, and all the glory.

Is their main premise true, that men and women are equal? To proclaim, “Women and Men Are Equal!” does not mean much if we do not also ask “equal in what way?”

On the one hand, YES, men and women are equal.

That is, they are equal in value. Before God and in the eyes of the law, men and women are equally valuable. The penalty is (as it should be) the same if you murder a man or a woman. He and she both hold equal claim to their Creator-given rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. We have equal access to God through Jesus Christ.

On the other hand, NO, men and women are not equal.

Being so obviously true, it’s amazing we must talk about this nowadays, but men and woman are manifestly different in form and function.

Physically, men are bigger and stronger than women, on average. In the transgender fad we have going on, is it any wonder that more male athletes who “transition” to being women win in sports than women who transition to the men’s side? Indeed, those “transgender women” (men pretending to be women) easily cream the “cisgender women” in whatever sport they’re doing. Why? Because their male bodies are naturally stronger and faster. “Transgender men” (women pretending to be men) who dare to engage in male sports often end up battered, beaten, and broken because they are physically weaker. The New York Post has a short article from December 2022 which includes video of a transgender woman (a male) body checking a transgender man (a female) in ice hockey. Unsurprisingly, the female body sustained injuries.

But the differences between the sexes are not limited to the physical. Our brains are different. Our emotional state is different. God designed us for different roles, so our feelings of fulfillment and success are based on different kinds of activities.

What Feminism Has Torn Down

Feminism has travelled far down the road of destroying men, women, and the family. Men, they say, should get in touch with their “feminine side,” which is an obscure way of saying, “Stop being so masculine—that’s toxic.” Women, they say, should stop submitting to their men, get out of the house, and get into all the occupations and hobbies men enjoy. That’s where they’ll find fulfillment and power and happiness.

More women are in the workforce today than ever before. Rather than rear their children, many women hand their kids over to a day-care center or nanny so they can go find that elusive “something more.” Reba McEntire captured this spirit in her song “Is There Life Out There?”

She married when she was 20
She thought she was ready, now she’s not so sure
She thought she’d done some living
But now she’s just wonderin’ what she’s living for
Now she’s feeling that there’s something more

Is there life out there? So much she hasn’t done
Is there life beyond her family and her home?
She’s done what she should, should she do what she dares?
She doesn’t want to leave, she’s just wonderin’, is there life out there?

Wives desert their husbands. Mothers abandon their kids. The feminist culture applauds and encourages such behavior if the women are seeking their “authentic selves” (being self-centered, in other words). Families fall apart, and new toxic cycles are introduced to future generations as the daughters imitate their mothers’ selfishness.

The wisest of women builds her house, but folly with her own hands tears it down.

Proverbs 14.1

Many women follow the path of folly these days.

Men, also, are abandoning their God-given roles in droves. Feminism has taught men not to act like men. One escape is homosexuality; then came the option of transitioning to female. They don’t want any part of toxic masculinity. They are the butt of jokes, the target of feminist vitriol, the hated gender. Happiness is not to be found in this mess, they decide, so they want out. It’s a sad shame so many boys know in their bones, literally in their DNA, they are built for something important and useful, but conventional wisdom cannot tell them what that purpose is.

Females flood the workforce, so workplace rules adjust to accommodate the shift in the gender balance. Intense, competitive, energetic men find themselves frowned upon and edged out, as the women desire softer, more lenient leadership. Men crave being pushed, even to test their limits. They enjoy obstacles to overcome, adversaries to defeat, rewards to win. In their hearts, men desire dragons to slay and princesses to protect.

Men don’t know how to talk to women anymore. They have not been trained to stand when a woman enters the room, remove their hat when they greet a woman, or soften their language around the gentler sex—mainly because the gentler sex no longer wishes to be considered gentler. Women use language as dirty as any man and joke about things as crass. They want to be “one of the guys.” And then they don’t. It quite confuses the men.

Do women think the same way about sex as men? If yes, most men would be on board with that arrangement. But then the women jump on the “me, too” bandwagon and start indicting all men for any time they made the women feel less than awesome in bed. Which way do the women want it, again? It turns out that free sex has a much larger impact on a woman’s life than a man’s—she is liable to get pregnant for some odd reason.

Men are designed to provide and protect.

When Moses passed the torch to Joshua, he said, “Be strong and courageous” (Joshua 1.5–9). Joshua led the nation of Israel in a series of battles to wipe out the various peoples and tribes who inhabited the land of Canaan. Giants lived in the land, warriors of impressive size and strength, so the need for courage and strength was essential. Who went out to fight? The men did!

Before Israel entered the Promised Land, they approached it from the east side of the Jordan River, and the tribes of Ruben, Gad, and half the tribe of Manasseh decided to settle there. Moses allowed it on one condition—that the men first leave their women and children and come fight with the rest of their brethren to conquer Canaan, as God had instructed (Num. 32.6ff). So they did, saying, “Our little ones, our wives, our livestock, and all our cattle shall remain there in the cities of Gilead, but your servants will pass over, every man who is armed for war, before the LORD to battle, as my lord orders” (Num 32.26–27). War was (and is) a man’s job.

All the judges, save Deborah, were men. During Deborah’s time, the commander of Israel’s army, Barak, refused to go into battle without her. Not that she would fight in the battle, but he wanted her there as God’s representative. Because of that, she told him the honor for victory would go to a woman, which happened when an amazing woman named Jael drove a tent stake through the head of Sisera, the commander of the enemy’s army. Although that brought honor to Jael, the lack of strong male leadership at the time was a dishonor to the nation.

King David’s mighty men were all…well…men (2 Sam. 23.8–39). These guys killed hundreds of enemies single-handedly, defeated giants, engaged in acts requiring immense bravery and strength.

The kings of Israel and Judah were all men. Only once did a woman (Athaliah) assume command (2 Kings 11) for a six-year stint (after killing off her grandkids!), but there was nothing holy or God-honoring in that event, and Judah rejoiced and enjoyed peace when she was killed.

Judges, Kings, Priests, Elders – all of these were male roles in God’s economy under the old covenant system. Even before the old covenant, we see this male-leader model. Historically, almost all nations have understood that men belong in those leadership offices.

God designed and equipped men for these roles in the family and in society in general.

Women are designed to manage and nurture.

God designed and quipped women in a different, possibly more glorious way. Woman was not created to fight and protect but to support her husband, manage her home, and nurture her children.

Form defines function. If you want to know what an axe is for, examine its form. It has a long handle for grasping and a blade for chopping and slicing. The axe was not designed for digging ditches but for splitting wood. A shovel, on the other hand, is not so useful for cutting a tree. If an axe is the only tool you have, you might use it for digging—it’s better than using your hands. And a shovel will get farther in cutting through wood than having no tool at all. But each was designed for a specific task because of its form.

A woman’s body is designed to bear and nourish children. She has a womb! She can make milk! As natural and common as this is, it’s amazing and awesome. We refer to childbirth as a miracle because it amazes us every time. God gave this ability to the woman only, and so we understand this is her job by design. She cannot bear a child without a man’s help, and while she is pregnant, she has an increased need for her man’s support and protection, but only she can carry and bear a child.

Her value is bound up in carrying out her God-given role. Hebrew women who discovered they were barren hated their situation! Sarah had resigned herself to never having kids, but when she bore Isaac, she rejoiced, saying, “God has made laughter for me; everyone who hears will laugh over me,” and “Who would have said to Abraham that Sarah would nurse children? Yet I have born him a son in his old age” (Gen. 21.6–7). Rachel was a bit more confrontational with her husband Jacob: “Give me children, or I shall die!” (Gen. 30.1), and when God finally opened her womb, she said, “God has taken away my reproach” (Gen. 30.23). Hannah, the mother of Samuel, was barren for a time, and she prayed earnestly to God for a child. She wept and would not eat. She considered her closed womb “an affliction” (1 Sam. 1.11).

We often call Proverbs 31.10–31 “The Virtuous Woman,” as it gives the picture of “an excellent wife.” As you read through this beautiful wisdom poem, you’ll see this woman works hard with her hands making food for her household, making clothing for her household, purchasing land and planting a vineyard in it, and helping the needy. “Strength and dignity are her clothing” (Pr. 31.25), and she “does not eat the bread of idleness” (Pr. 31.27). She fears God, and the fruit of her hands, her works, praise her in the gates (Pr. 31.30–31). Notice, the focus of all her work is her family and her home. There is so much to do, so much to prepare for each year as the seasons change and as children grow up. God designed her for this great task.

Paul wrote that the older women “are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled” (Titus 2.3–5).

For Us and Our Children

God’s intended roles for women and men have not changed since he created us, but a sinful and foolish world constantly obscures the beauty and truth of his plan. The world twists the leadership of man into something hurtful and domineering, then it labels man a violent abuser. The world twists the submission of the women into something confining and degrading, then encourages women to dominate the men. So our world remains confused, lost, floundering, like a train off its track.

But God is gracious—he gives us direction, lights our path, imparts wisdom. We have no need to listen to the world’s confusion; we should simply follow the guidance of him who created men and women. He created us for specific purposes, and when we obey and submit to his ways, we fulfill the greatest purpose of all—we glorify God.